Conflict with defining Freedom

What Freedom is to me??? I can tell you more what Freedom isn't than what Freedom is… In my eyes, I've am not Free… Freedom is an extension of Love… And, Love is a different conversation entirely… Let's get back to Freedom… My vision of Freedom… Is being detached from the world, but being attached to the world in all its beauty… Detached-attachment sounds contradictory, but it actually makes sense… You must come to terms that your complete environment is created by you… Sure, there are some elements that you don't create because they are created by some other force. You must be able to create a world you wish to reside in, then let go of it after making that world… Freedom is a sense of no control over other subjects, and not allowing other subjects to control you… It sounds very crazy, but controlling an object places you under a force of control, which obstructs your freedom… You may be controlling it, but in a sense it is controlling you by holding your concentration… So, you must be able to create and cease control over creation… Most people believe that having the means and being able to create something is Freedom. Moreover, some people believe that being able to control a force shows that you are free… On the contrary, a desire to control other forces is created by a lack of freedom… A great quote to live by is
"No one is free if others are oppressed."
—Andre 3000 of Outkast, ATLiens.
Paulo Friere devoted a complete book on examining the phenomenon of oppression, oppressive behavior, and how it is subconsciously taught to people. This book alone explains the oppressive origin of destructive behavior exhibited by people, who live in oppressive living conditions. So, freedom must not only recognize the perpetuation of oppression, but signal individuals whenever they are an oppressive force. Now, this draws man into a Pandora box because if you were truly free… Would you not need to monitor yourself for oppressive tendencies? So, freedom is self training until it is habitual… Many people believe monks are free… However, in their freedom from the earth, some are mentally captive because it is not habitual for them to "not desire." So, being an individual controlled by desires shows one's lack of freedom??? Or, being able to answer your desires at will show absolute freedom???
Imagine, if you could answer all your desires… Would you be free to pursue more meaningful deeds??? If extinguishing all your desires were possible, then would you come to the conclusion that freedom from all material things is your only desire??? I am plagued by this question everyday… I try to rationalize why I yearn to make money; why I like expensive jewelry, gadgets, and other toys… I negotiate a pact with myself on how to obtain these luxuries of life. I also battle with myself on giving up chasing after these material possessions and soothing my souls desires… But, what does my soul desire… I figured staying in school, furthering my education would be the answer… My soul does not desire institutionalized education… My soul desires freedom… But, I try to facilitate a free environment in school… I have been taught that all knowledge can be acquired from a book… I have been taught books free my mind… However, I become captive to the words on those pages… I get caught in those pages… In this literature prison, I wish for freedom like the thoughts that are created as I read those pages… I have even entered into open dialogues with people… I feel like conversations cause souls to dance together… In my conversations, I soon become the dominant party… I begin to inflict my free will and my free tongue onto the other parties… Conversations soon lead into becoming power struggles, which chain use to our views… What happened to freedom in those conversations? It just evaporates into nothingness…
Now, nothingness seems to be real freedom… And, why am I plagued with this question of "is nothingness the same as freedom?" I sit and stare into nothingness, but my mind becomes captive to my thoughts… My thoughts are usually filled with something… My thoughts encompass everything from 'task I need to do' to 'things I want to do.' I watch as this nothingness shackles me to the thoughts of action…
After I have rested for about an hour, I conclude that freedom is majestic… It is the unicorn we all chase after… Freedom is being able to reconcile your differences prior to a dialogue and engaging in a verbal dancing of the souls… It is being able to facilitate an exchange of all that binds us together in this world as a means of understanding ourselves… Freedom is action, which leads to a higher resolution of thought… With that thought, we usher in a greater action of self… It is being able to negotiate with the spirit on how to live… Better yet, it is being able to negotiate the question, "what to live for?"
Daily, I am in conflict with this abstract term called FREEDOM… One day, it will all make sense… And, maybe, I will possess it… All the situations, I have experienced lead me to this question in one way or another… If I had more time? If I had more money? If I would have chose this rather than that? It all leads back to my soul trying to grab freedom… I guess coming from a cultural background that has recently gained some civil freedoms, but still is under subtle oppression, I contemplate such a question…